How to let go of the girl you love. I can’t forget my ex-girlfriend, how to forget the ex-girlfriend you love

Each of us has experienced the fact that we broke up with our girlfriend and suffered after that. How to forget a girl, stop loving and start living a new life?

Parting with a loved one is always a painful process. Each person experiences a breakup in their own way, and each has their own way of getting out of a negative state. There are many ways to overcome the painful consequences of a breakup. Find a way out of the current situation that is most suitable for you. And remember: dealing with pain takes time. So please be patient!

1. Stop communication

1.1 Keep your distance. Completely break off your relationship with your ex-girlfriend. The more often you see her, the greater your pain will be. Make the necessary changes to your schedule so you don't see ex-girlfriend.

Avoid places your ex-girlfriend frequents. Don't visit her favorite restaurants, cafes or shops.

Also, avoid attending events that she might attend. Otherwise, memories may come flooding back to you, which can cause depression and a bad mood. If both you and your ex-girlfriend have been invited to a party, tell the organizer that you are busy. It's better to skip the party than deal with disappointment and pain later.

1.2 Get rid of all things that may remind you of this girl. Remove all her things from your room. Get rid of everything that reminds you of her. A girl's things will remind you of her and the pain she caused you, so put them all away.

1.3 Stop communication. Forbid yourself from communicating with the girl who hurt you. Don't call her or text her. Of course, there is a chance that you will want to hear her voice, but remember that with your actions you will again open the door to pain and disappointment. The more often you communicate, the harder it will be for you to forget her.

Unfriend her on social networks. If you don't do this, you will indirectly continue to communicate with her. This can lead to nostalgia for the relationship. If you think this would be rude on your part, change your news feed so that you don't have to view her news. Also, remove her number from your contact list.

1.4 Don't talk to her friends. If you have mutual friends, try to communicate with them as little as possible. Spend time with people who don't know your ex-girlfriend.

Hang out with friends you hung out with before you started dating this girl. They will not interfere in your relationship. They will also help you recover after a breakup.

2. Get rid of painful feelings

2.1 Allow yourself to feel sad. If you don't stop yourself from feeling angry and disappointed, it will be easier for you to get rid of negative feelings and you will quickly forget the girl who hurt you.

2.2 Set time boundaries. Decide for yourself how long you will feel sad. After a certain period of time, forbid yourself to be sad and try to return to life. Stick to the set time period.

Give yourself one week. During this week, you may cry, get angry, listen to sad music, or do things that will help you return to normal life later. After a week, try to get rid of painful feelings.

Don't worry if you are still thinking about this girl. If you forbid yourself to do this, you will think about her even more. In psychology, this phenomenon is called the “boomerang effect.” If you find yourself thinking about your ex-girlfriend, accept the thought and then let it go.

2.3 Talk to a loved one. Talk to a relative or friend about your feelings. By expressing what is on your heart, it will be easier for you to get rid of your pain.

Trust what's on your heart to your journal. If you want to stop thinking about a girl who hurt you, write down thoughts about her in a journal. This will make it easier for you not to think about her.

After you have talked to a loved one or expressed your thoughts in a diary, forbid yourself to talk about this girl. If someone asks you about her, move the conversation to another topic.

3. Have a social life

3.1 Go on dates. If you want to quickly recover from a breakup, find yourself a new girlfriend. If you think you're ready for a new relationship, go for it!

During the first few dates, try not to mention your ex-girlfriend. Over time you will be able to talk about it. However, while your memories are still fresh, you should not discuss your past relationships.

3.2 Be active social life. Even if you are not ready to build new relationships, do not miss the opportunity to communicate with friends. Stay socially active.

Of course, after a breakup, you may want to be alone. However, do not isolate yourself from society for long. Otherwise, you will not be able to quickly recover from a breakup.

3.3 Find new ways to stay socially active. It will be difficult for you to forget about your ex-girlfriend if you continue to do what you did with her. Find new hobbies and friends who share your interests.

Spend time in restaurants and cafes that you have not been to before. You will be able to meet new people. Probably, while you were dating a girl, you did not have the opportunity to visit different establishments.

Choose a new activity that will help you make friends. Interesting activity and new friends will help you take your mind off thoughts related to the past. You will be able to break the connection that is keeping you and your ex-girlfriend.

4. Think about the future

4.1 Set a new goal for yourself. Focus on achieving your new goal. If you feel like you miss your ex-girlfriend, try to focus all your thoughts on achieving a new goal.

According to research, a person who is overcome by intrusive thoughts associated with memories of an ex-girlfriend activates the same part of the brain that is responsible for the emergence of an irresistible desire to use drugs or alcoholic beverages. Find something more productive to do.

4.2 Start going to the gym. Exercising reduces stress levels. Maintenance friendly relations can get rid of negative consequences stress.

4.3 Focus on yourself. Since you have no one to take care of yet, you can turn all your attention to yourself. Satisfy your needs and desires. Take care of yourself.

Set goals related to work or education. Perhaps a wonderful opportunity has opened up for you to get promoted or improve your studies.

4.4 Find a new hobby. If you have always dreamed of doing something new, for example, learning the secrets of cooking or mastering the new kind sports, now is the time to make your dreams come true. You will be able to take your mind off sad thoughts.

4.5 Look to the future. Remember that your pain will go away over time. Look at the current situation as a temporary period in your life.

Be willing to change your thinking if you want to get over the girl who hurt you. Save positive attitude and constantly remind yourself that you can overcome anything. This may seem like an insurmountable task right now. However, if you think about it this way, it will actually be difficult for you to get over your ex-girlfriend.

While it is well known that strong emotions often create particularly vivid memories, remember that such memories are not always accurate. Most likely, the most pleasant moments of your relationship come to mind.

Getting over your ex-girlfriend takes time and patience. Sometimes it can take months or years to deal with your feelings. Think about the future.

Some people, after a breakup, begin to abuse alcohol, take psychotropic drugs without a doctor's prescription, or engage in self-harm. If you feel like you can't handle the situation on your own, seek professional help.

There is no need to stalk your ex-girlfriend, her friends or family members. This is fraught with serious consequences. If you are constantly haunted by thoughts of revenge, consult a psychotherapist.

April 2, 2015, at 7:05 pm

Perhaps you have had a situation in your life when a girl whom you love very much left you, and you are thinking about how to forget her as quickly as possible. Or, maybe even the other way around - you stopped loving her and broke up with her, but she doesn’t want to break off relations with you so quickly. In our article we will describe in detail how you can part with your loved one as painlessly as possible.

Many young people, when meeting girls, do not think about it and do not allow the thought that nothing might work out with her. And for this reason they suffer very much.

After she leaves you and says a bunch of nasty things after you, you have no choice but to forget her. But forget the beloved girl you pictured in your thoughts happy life- of course, very, very difficult. But it's still possible.

How can this be achieved? There are so many ways to forget your girlfriend. We will offer only a few of them, the most proven ones. Here they are:

* Throw away or hide away all the things that remind you of her. If the relationship was long-term and she was at your house, then there should be things in the house that she touched or gave to you. Remember what things she gave you, put them in a bag and throw them away. With this act you will pave the way to new life.

* Find a job for yourself. If you were dating a girl and did not have a permanent job, then you need to find a permanent job for yourself. This will give you the opportunity to alleviate the torment and reduce the number of thoughts about her.

* Play sports. Thinking about the girl who dumped you can greatly undermine your love life and self-esteem. Your emotions must come out of you, you must liberate yourself. And the best way to do this is through sport. Besides, nothing bad will happen if you start playing sports. Pump up your abs and girls will look at you completely differently.

* Don't be alone with yourself. Go somewhere with friends and have fun. Even if you loved her very much, this does not mean that you need to give up on your life.

* Stop all contact with her. Girls really like to play with the feelings of guys, they like it when they are looked after, run around, and laid out with a carpet. Don't be like that - you have a feeling self-esteem. If you decide to forget her, don’t talk to her or see her again.

*Remember: she is not the only one. There are hundreds of other girls more worthy of your attention. As they say, a wedge is knocked out with a wedge. Only new girl will help you forget your old one faster, even if you spent many happy days with her.

* Everything that is done is all for the better. Yes, you didn't break up with her very well, and you can't remain friends. But it happens in life that parting is even good. Perhaps you are not destined to be together. Well, okay, find yourself another one. In the end, even if you got married, had children, and then broke up anyway, the consequences would be much more serious.

As you understand from the above, there are no hopeless situations. And even if a girl leaves you, you should not become limp and panic. After all, life goes on. And your future depends on how you arrange it.

This concludes our article. Thank you for your attention!

Also on our website you can find dating for serious relationships in and other cities of Ukraine.

How to forget a girl - 5 best ways + useful recommendations from experienced psychologists.

“Don’t part with your loved ones,” an old song says, but we don’t always make the decision to be close to a loved one; sometimes they make it for us.

“I’m leaving you,” you can hardly find guys who have never heard this phrase from girls.

If the romance has exhausted itself, then it is not so important who exactly made the decision to break up, you will not experience much suffering.

But often after such an unpleasant conversation, guys have to rack their brains, how to forget a girl the one you continue to love.

It's very difficult, especially at first.

You feel like you can never forget the girl you love so much.

But there are ways after breaking up with dear person don’t do anything stupid and after a while restore your peace of mind.

Is it possible to forget the girl you love?

Oh, I heard this question more than once from my male friends when they were looking for a vest to cry about “this infection that I loved so much, but she left me.”

The emotions that you experience after are completely understandable and forgivable, only if you do not start hiding behind them in order to derail your life and take stupid actions that you will definitely regret.

You can forget even your beloved girl if:

Direct the emotions that are currently raging in you towards something useful, for example, self-realization.
Do not allow yourself to drown in this suffering so much that you can no longer be saved.
Do not follow the lead of your addictions (exorbitant amounts of alcohol and promiscuous sexual relations will only make things worse).
Perceive a breakup with a girl who needs to be forgotten not as a terrible tragedy, but as preparation for a new stage in life.
I sincerely believe that your big and happy love- still to come.

What do guys need to remember when trying to get over a girl?

You loved her very much, were absolutely happy, made plans for a future together, and one terrible day, without declaring war, she came and said that everything was over between you, because she:

no longer loves you;
found another;
goes far;
wants to focus on his career;
I’m not ready for a serious relationship - the reasons may be different, but this news hurts equally strongly.

Naturally, any guy in such a situation will begin to think about how to forget the girl he loves, what makes him suffer so much.

Firstly, you need to throw out the accumulated emotions: sign up for a boxing class, break dishes, get drunk best friend(just let it be a one-time event!), go into the forest to scream to your heart’s content, etc.

Secondly, you need to pull yourself together and not allow yourself to do anything stupid.

If you are trying to forget the girl you love, then please remember that:

the suffering you experience is a natural reaction of the body and you should not be ashamed of it;
sooner or later your pain will subside; when this happens depends largely on you;
this young lady, no matter how ideal you consider her, is not the last in this world - there are much more beautiful, kinder, smarter and better than her.

It is also very important to realize that you suffer not so much for a specific person, but because this particular girl satisfied your needs: communicative, sexual, emotional, etc.

To forget this particular girl, you need to find a person who will satisfy your needs even better.

The strength of the pain from breaking up with your girlfriend largely depends on how strong feelings you felt for her.

If you needed a young lady just to have fun and activate intimate life, then you are unlikely to miss her after she decides to break up with you.

Guys who are abandoned by their beloved girlfriends experience completely different emotions.

My beloved girl, oh, how hard it is to forget.

The advice of a psychologist will not be superfluous in this difficult matter.

Psychologists advise guys who want to quickly forget a girl to go through 4 stages:

Plan actions to eradicate it from your heart.

This can be done by hiding all photos together, destroying or donating her gifts, deleting her from friends on social networks, etc.

Find ways to distract yourself from your suffering.

Fill your life to the maximum with some interesting and useful things, then you simply won’t have time to revel in suffering.

Start paying attention to other girls.

Yes, you still love the one who hurt you so much, but if you are not going to accept celibacy or change your sexual orientation, then it's time to start.

Wait for time to heal the wounds.

Time is the best healer of all, it has the power to heal even the most terrible wounds.

The healing process will be faster if you stop reveling in your pain and live life to the fullest.

How to forget your beloved girl who left this world?

Sometimes the most dangerous and merciless enemy stands in the way of love, which even the strongest people cannot cope with.

This is death.

Losing your beloved girl as a result of her death is the worst thing, because no one and nothing can bring her back.

If you have experienced something similar, then I sincerely sympathize with you, but I advise you to pull yourself together after grieving.

You will be able to forget your girlfriend faster if you:

Stop being angry with her for leaving you.
Remember how much she loved you, which means she wished you boundless happiness, which you will not feel if you revel in suffering.

You will understand that your beloved would definitely not approve of you giving up your life.

She had no choice what to do with her life, but you do!

You will keep a fond memory of her, but you will not build a memorial to her memory at home, go through joint photos every day, spend half a day in the cemetery, etc.
You will realize several of her desires, for example, become a volunteer at a shelter for homeless animals, as she always wanted, etc.
You will live active life good man so that she can be proud of you.
Allow time to heal your wounds rather than constantly picking at them.

To forget your loved one after separation,

It will be useful to listen to the advice from this video:

5 ways to quickly forget a girl

For desperate Romeos who can’t recover after being abandoned by the girl they love, I would advise them not to be a wuss.

People cope with such terrible shocks that you would be ashamed of your snot if you knew about them because some girl left you.

If you can't get over a girl, try the following:

Let something new into your life.

Start doing something you've never done before, like skydiving or taking an extreme driving course.

Use your free time and money to pamper yourself.: sign up for some courses, buy yourself an expensive gift (which your ex would definitely not approve of), go on a trip, etc.

Do some sports.

Start going to the gym at least three times a week.

Firstly, there will be fewer stupid thoughts in your head, secondly, beautiful, slender girls visit the gym, and thirdly, with the addition of muscle mass, self-esteem will begin to rise.

Get a career.

Troubles in your personal life are an excellent opportunity to realize your potential in your profession.

Once you get a decent position and start, there will be no end to the girls.

Distract yourself from sad thoughts with everyone possible ways : attend parties, meet friends, travel, study, get a pet, start helping people, etc.

If you've experienced a painful breakup, then you're doing absolutely the right thing in thinking... how to quickly forget a girl.

You shouldn’t suffer for a long time for a person who doesn’t care about you at all.

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Just yesterday, a dream girl, an ideal of beauty and femininity, was sitting next to you. But today the result is that you are alone. Maybe she did something. And you are not ready to forgive her, or vice versa, but the essence of the situation does not change. She's not with you and all you need is to quickly get through this stage, be reborn and start writing a new page in your life. This is right. This is a good experience that will bring you knowledge, strengthen you, so first let's learn to treat separation differently. But first you need to understand how to forget a girl, even if you love her very much, but she doesn’t love you.

Attitude to the process

Yes, every person is exceptional. But you shouldn’t think that we only have one half and that’s it, that’s where life ends. Each of us is an egoist, no matter how you turn it. Do you prefer to live for the sake of the one and only one? This is not true, no matter how much you say otherwise. In any case, it is you who receive positive emotions from what you do for her.
Now you have lost this emotional nourishment, and you need to do something about it, you need to forget the girl, but how? It's quite simple, find a substitute. Pay attention to other girls. In your city there are no less attractive, no less interesting personalities than the one with whom you broke up.
Think about the state of flow. You may have already read about this on my blog. If not, follow the link and get acquainted with “How to meet girls from a state of flow”. This article will give you an understanding of the state of flow. In a state of flow, you not only manage to meet girls, you begin to live by different rules, and you learn everything from you.

If you take the state of flow as your life principle, your worldview will change forever. This philosophy promotes one simple attitude: “Everything that happens to you gradually brings you closer to the goal that you have set for yourself.” Did you want a relationship, but broke up with your girlfriend? So this is not your person, look for someone else, you will find happiness with someone else!

The difficulty of how to forget the girl you love is not a new problem, and psychologists have long ago found ways to solve it. You should listen to their opinion, because this is the easiest way. Everything ingenious is simple. So is this algorithm by which you will work in the next few months. It involves not only parting with feelings, but also improving one’s moral and physical qualities. Let's move on to it.

part with the past;
change your attitude towards what is happening at the moment;
get rid of obsessive thoughts;
strengthen the villa of will;
improve your physical fitness.

The latter somehow doesn’t fit with everything else, doesn’t it? In fact, it is physical activity that makes it much easier to survive any emotional experiences.. And now in detail, point by point.

Let's part with the past

First, you should get rid of everything that reminds you of the girl. When you look at old things, you will involuntarily remember her, no matter what you do. So bring it garbage bag, detergents and disinfect your home.

First, get rid of gifts, clothes and photographs. These can be absolutely any objects, it is important that they connect you.
Do some deep cleaning in your home. You need to clean every last hair and scent of her perfume.
Delete all photos and messages from your phone, blacklist the number and delete it too, so you won’t be tempted to call. It’s better to change your number altogether, because she might call too.
Get busy social networks, clean your friends list, remove her from that list. Restrict access to your page.

As a result you completely isolated yourself from her and got rid of everything that might remind you of her. Even this process already brings considerable pleasure in most cases. All these actions must be carried out, regardless of the reason for your separation. They will help you come to terms with your loss much faster and move towards something new.

Changing our attitude towards what is happening now

To make it easier to forget a girl, let's think about what you lost? Just one of the opportunities to show feelings. How many more such opportunities? Even in your city there are thousands of girls who need you. Your ability to show feelings and love has not disappeared, you are still the same.

Understand one very simple truth. Someday, perhaps already within this week (don’t deny it, anything is possible), you will find another girl to whom you will give your emotions. And she will not reject them, but will accept them with gratitude.
To alleviate the situation, write a letter. No address. The form can be any: electronic or written. But it is very important to write it. In it, write about what you are grateful for to the girl you broke up with. What good things did you have together? Surely there will be moments. Thank her for what you had, as you had it. No need to send it. You are writing this letter for yourself, not for her. When you're done, simply remove or throw away.

Let's clear our thoughts

Probably the most difficult stage. However, psychologists have found several effective techniques, which, although they won’t get rid of obsessive thoughts completely, will significantly ease the situation.
Here's two for you good techniques that really help.

Find time to relax at home, relax. Take a comfortable position, sit down. Concentrate on yourself, on your feelings. Imagine that the air you are breathing now is the most... better air. This is the wind of change that brings you the desire to build new relationships, live differently, engage in self-improvement, and eliminate mistakes. Now you have put yourself back together, you have become stronger. Now you're ready for something new.
Memories, and this disgusting feeling always comes in waves. When a new wave comes, you need to distract yourself. Start training your memory, learn poems, songs, foreign language, whatever. It is important that the process occupies your mental activity completely. This will not only relieve obsessive thoughts, but will also be beneficial.

Let's strengthen your willpower

One of the most powerful tools in psychology is visualization.. Imagine in your head that you are a prisoner. You are shackled with heavy chains that do not allow you to move or live normally. These shackles are your feelings for her, those feelings that you need to forget and it’s better to do it quickly. Now, with an effort of will, break these shackles and let them fall at your feet.

Let's get you in order

Many have noted that physical activity is The best way experience moral pain. Scrape yourself out of bed already and go to the gym or go outside if you don’t want to spend money. Work out in the mornings and evenings, practice contrast showers, strengthen yourself physically - you will strengthen yourself mentally.
Within a week you will become more balanced, and you will feel the results. Agree that a new page of life will be better written with a toned body.

Analyzing

Analyze what you experienced. No matter how bad the relationship was or how it ended, you still went through some experience. Try to benefit from it. Now you will no longer conduct relationships this way, you will not choose such a girl, now everything will be different.
The mistakes that were made in these relationships will be taken into account in the future. This is how you will not only forget the ex-girlfriend you love, but also make the most of what happened. And also just pay attention to the girls who surround you. Among them there are many who will accept your feelings with gratitude and reciprocate.

People meet, people fall in love, but they don’t always get married, sometimes they break up. And for someone alone, this parting certainly hurts the heart. And who is not familiar with this feeling, when it seems that life has stopped, and everything that happens has no meaning, because the one who just recently prepared your morning coffee suddenly waved her hand and wished to remain friends. And more and more often you ask yourself the question:

How to forget the girl you love?

Surely friends and relatives have already tried to console you, repeating the banal “time heals” and “everything passes.” You yourself know all this, but now, while everything has not yet passed, and time drags on painfully long on sleepless nights, you feel pain and disgust, and such advice, which does not make it any easier, only irritates you. Some people advise getting drunk and forgetting yourself, but this is not a solution in any situation, and in matters of the heart it will make things even worse. After all, you will probably call her, say drunken nonsense, maybe be rude, or, on the contrary, start begging her to come back. And in the morning you will hate yourself and be tormented even more. What should you do to continue living a normal life? We will try to give you some advice, of course you will not forget her in an instant, as if by magic, but we hope that your suffering will not be so painful. In the end, in a few years, you will definitely remember it rarely, just as some insignificant life episode.

So how to forget your ex-girlfriend

As was said above, don’t get drunk, but this does not mean that you should lead an ascetic lifestyle in order to avoid the temptation to fall into a bar with your friends. First, make sure that there really is nothing more between you. Because even after a strong quarrel and breakup, relationships can improve. If everything is really bad, and the broken cannot be mended, start building a new life. And ask yourself less about how to stop loving her. Now you have more free time, use it wisely, do something that you have long dreamed of and have been putting off on the back burner. Haven't you dreamed of anything? Then just come up with a new hobby for yourself, preferably one that is very active and sociable; believe me, loneliness is now your worst enemy. Communicate, educate yourself, develop and assert yourself.

The best incentive can be your possible future communication. Well, so that after some time, your ex, suddenly meeting you by chance on the street or in a cafe, does not see some emaciated ghost-like creature. Let her see you, a confident, smart, cheerful guy. Let her jaw drop and she realize who she has lost. Do everything so that she bites her elbows and regrets breaking off relations with you.

Don't call or answer her calls! Many girls, even after breaking up with a guy, like to keep him with them. This “let’s remain friends” thing won’t lead to anything good. Of course, there is no need to part with enemies either, but it is better to stop communication for a while. Otherwise, you expose yourself to perhaps false hopes. There is no need to hate and curse your ex; any manifestation of emotions towards her is now unnecessary. Better visualize your future life with another girl. Imagine yourself happy with new girlfriend, and how, against the backdrop of this happiness, your memories of a once-broken heart seem funny. And believe me, dude, this is exactly how it will be. As soon as you meet someone else and fall in love, memories of past relationships will no longer bother you, and you will stop remembering your exes altogether. And you will think with a smile about how you once looked for the answer to the question of how to forget a girl and not suffer.

Look at other girls. Perhaps you still think that there is no other one, that she is the one and only, yes, she is, but she is just as unique as the others. Of course, oh serious relationship speech cannot go on yet. You don’t need this now, but starting a slight intrigue, or just sleeping with that blonde from the next door who always smiles at you while walking her pug is not a sin at all, but even a benefit.

If you are completely depressed, dude, and all the advice, including ours, does not help you in any way, if you are very painfully experiencing a breakup, then you better consult a specialist, yes, you guessed it, make an appointment with a psychologist, these people, believe me , have helped many and it’s not in vain that he chews his bread.